It’s only Thursday?

I feel like this week has been incredibly long. Maybe it’s because I spent all of last week in the hospital and in an incredible amount of pain, and this week I’m back to waking up early and watching the kids. Even though I don’t have a “real” job yet, it does feel nice to still wake up in the morning and do stuff with my day, even though I don’t have to. When I was unemployed before, my bipolar would keep me so low, that I wouldn’t get out of bed, do anything, go anywhere, or even look for jobs. I just existed, slept all the time, and just wasted away. That’s the OPPOSITE of what I’m doing right now.

I usually wake up around 7 or 8 AM and get ready and watch 3 kids, ages 8, 5 and 3 all day! They’re great kids and they love me so I enjoy it. It helps out my best friend so she doesn’t have to pay for a babysitter or wait on one, since I’m already living here. All I have to do is wake up. I usually wait until the kids are awake before I take a shower but I think after this blog I might try to squeeze one in since they’re still dead asleep. (For now at least)

I’m really looking forward to the weekend because it’s my family reunion in Chicago!

I’ve never been to a family reunion before, so this should be fun. My dad’s side of the family only consists of my dad, my uncle & his wife, me and my sister. So this reunion is on my mom’s side of the family which happens to be quite large. Her cousins live in Chicago and they’re throwing it at their house! I am so excited to see this part of my family! Some of them I haven’t seen in years, and I’ve definitely grown up and changed a lot since the last they’ve seen me. I think I was like 9 or 10 the last time I saw some of my relatives, so this will be a great time to reconnect.

We are leaving tomorrow morning around 8 AM. I asked if we could leave a little later, but of course she said no. Good just moved into a new house, so I might go and stay the night there tonight with all my stuff for my trip, then go to my mom’s house from there in the morning since it’s closer. My mom told me I can just sleep in the car, but the last time I did that on a road trip with her, she got pulled over 3 times for speeding!!! Yeah, so I’m definitely going to stay awake for this one.

I have to get my laundry done, pack, watch the kids, and get everything done before tonight. I want to see good before I go on my trip, but I’ve never stayed at his place before, so I’m a little nervous/uncomfortable. I don’t know why, but I just am. Maybe because his mom lives there, and good and I have been talking for a while, and I haven’t really met his mom or know about her. I’ve only talked with her a few times in a group setting, but never one on one. So she said to him that she feels like she doesn’t even know me, it made me feel kind of awkward. See the image below as a reference of how I feel.

So here’s a picture from yesterday. I didn’t feel like washing my hair or styling it because it’s so frizzy, I managed to whip it back and pull it off. My makeup was on point yesterday too. (I’m posting yesterday’s selfie because I have yet to shower and take one today yet)

Note the matching cross necklace and earrings. Getting my Jesus and fashion on at the same time. Oh here’s something else super cute. My aunt that lives in North Carolina makes these cute ass wreaths. She decided to make me a Hello Kitty one. I’m going to get it this weekend at the reunion! How cute is this?

Let’s see….. I guess that’s really all that I have to post on today. It’s only 9:30 and I’ve managed to already do laundry, make my bed, go to my aunt & uncles house, go for coffee, talk to my friend for a bit, and write this blog! I’d say I’m on a good track of productivity today so getting things ready for my trip should be pretty easy….. That is if I keep this pace up. Anyway, I will try and blog while I’m gone, I’m going to take my laptop with me, and my phone of course! I’m sure I’ll put up a post tomorrow because Fridays are my favorite days to post! (They have great Friday memes too) Catch you guys later.

PS, I’ve been working on some rap songs. I got a few tracks down. Get ready for your mind to be blown. I went from being a classical musician and singer, to a rap artist. Yeah that’s whats up.

 Oh PPS, I got a call from a job yesterday saying that I didn’t get the job that I applied for which was a customer service call center position. HOWEVER, they want me for mortgage brokering. I’d have train for 4 months to be certified, then start working with an uncapped commission. The job requires a credit check, I don’t know what they’re looking for. I don’t have good credit, but I have also nothing HUGE or bad on there like foreclosure, bankruptcy, anything like that so……hopefully that goes well!

Let me elaborate… It’s Sunday and I’m slow moving

Let me elaborate on my Amy Whinehouse post last night. I was drunk, couldn’t talk to him and I feel like I’m the bad person in good and mine’s relationship. He’s innocent and young, and I’m wild and fucked up. He’s so good to me and I feel like I am going to ruin it. These are the thoughts I think. He always tells me to stop thinking so much. But I’m 8 1/2 years older than him. I’m just no good. He feels things for me that he hasn’t been able to experience, but at the same time, he makes me feel so good about myself. But I feel like I’ll ruin him will all my emotional baggage.

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I am freaking out in my head literally over nothing. I over analyze. The fact that I have ADHD and I’m bipolar is really fucked up.

I have a lot of errands to run today so I’m trying to be one of these, much like everyday. So this isn’t relaly any different.

I just have to drive all the way out to where I used to live just to get a prescription filled. Because if I do it around here they have to call the doctor and verify it and considering it’s Sunday, well they won’t be able to do anything. So this is the best solution. I am hoping this guy will drive it back out to me later since he wants it. I’m hustling right now because I don’t need it and it’s something that helps his grieving mother, so I feel like everyone wins. HUSTLE. Don’t judge, You’re not judge Judy.

I’m having the girls in my room right now they’re watching a movie because they love being in the basement with all my Hello Kitty stuff. Then I’m going to run all my crazy errands of the day.