Up before 9. WOW

It’s the coffee I’m telling ya. I’m supposed to be watching the girls today but they’re currently asleep at their friends house down the street. What will most likely happen is that they’ll wake up, come down here and change, eat, and go back down and play. This babysitting gig is easy when I don’t have the 3 year old. I just have 2 amazing little girls today! I also got a letter from the post office saying my mail forwarding went through and that’s great. I turned in the keys to my old place. BYE BYE BYE!

See you in court clown faces. They tried to change the court date on him and my (possible) attorney can’t make that date either, so now they’re even fighting about dates. This is fucking amazing. I did leave some stuff in my old place that I didn’t want anymore, and the power got kicked off before I could empty the fridge, so I left all THAT for them too. Plus my dog tore the fuck up out of my blinds and they’re scattered all over the floor, so I’d imagine the other attorney is going to try and seek damages for that too. Bitch, please.

I have a doctors appointment today to establish care with a new doctor. I’m pissed because I saw my old one for 20+ years, however it’s in the same practice. It’s all because I have new insurance. So I am having just a check up today. Then they want me to have another physical exam, even though I had one in February. Whatever insurance, your paying not me. Not my problem!

Ha memes are awesome for anything. For example:

Also, it’s Throwback Thursday, so this is pretty funny…

Or we even got stuff like this….

And if I had a job, or if you presently do, this is great too…

Anyway, what I wanted to talk about is deep. We learn everything from our families. Who we are as people, some of our values, others we develop on our own, but mostly our perception on relationships themselves. When you see your life as a kid through as an adult things start to make more sense. I realize that my problem with relationships come from my parents staying in an unhappy marriage for the sake of the kids, me and my sister. Worst mistake ever. I think they would have been much happier if they divorced at a young age they would be much happier people. But it made me not want to be in a relationship, or any sort of commitment which I posted about a few days ago. I’m lucky that’s the worst thing that happened to me because it’s emotionally scarring and damaging, and we carry it for the rest of our lives.

My friend recently told me a really saddening story about a guy she seeing. As a kid his mom sent him to live with his dad, then lived there for a few years, and sent him back to his moms for the summer, and didn’t talk to him for 10 years. I couldn’t believe how tragic that is. That’s a piece of you, your life. It explains so much about him though, and I tried to explain it to her. I can only assume that he thinks people are going to leave him out of the blue without warning. It’s hard for her because she can’t really get close to him because I’m sure he’s built this wall up since that happened as a kid and it’s going to take a lot to break down. Like I said we learn everything from our families, and then when we get with other people, we basically bring what we know into the relationship, although we have two totally different ideas of the concept of a relationship. Just like how my dad treated my mom like shit, I too chased after guys who treated me like shit. I didn’t even realize that’s a wall I had built up, and they were the wrong people so they never wanted to knock it down, just knock me down.

His walls are built up so high that she is having a hard time within their relationship because of this. I feel bad for my friend too because all she wants and deserves is love, affection, attention, support, and she can’t get that from him right now. All I can offer is my support to her and tell her these things myself, because she’s a wonderful person, and I really don’t think she gets the all the credit she deserves for everything she does, for pretty much everyone. I love you girl, you know I do. You’ll break through and I hope it turns into a wonderful thing, because you deserve it.

Well I suppose I should try to catch a shower sometime in here before these kiddos get home, although I would like to indulge in more coffee and cigarettes. Mneh, I’ll wait

I had my interview yesterday, and I think it went great. They went through a basic questionnaire with me, and I think I did really well. I had a hard time answering what my career path was. I wanted to be like look lady, I take shit one day at a time. I hustle, I can do websites, blogging, Google advertising all on the side, I can do any job in the corporate world, starting down from the bottom and working my way up. I love doing sales, and this job requires a lot of upselling which I’m good at and have always had to do, even back at my days working at Chili’s. Those people wanted us to upsell like everything. Jesus, if they want it they’ll order it. I still did it though cause it was my job, so a lot of people ate shit they didn’t want, but I made them want it.

I’m waiting to hear for a call back from the woman I originally talked to, and who called me for the interview. The person who interviewed me said that she was going to give the questionnaire to her, and she seemed to already like me over the phone. But then after that I got a little depressed getting my hopes up. Like why would they want me?

I put zero effort into finding this job, but it’s a good job and one I’d like to have so I really hope it does work out for me. They said it’s really similar to one of my previous jobs in how they’re setup, and well not to brag but I was the top sales agent there, with a 42′ flat screen and xBox 360 with Kinect to prove it mother fuckers. Basically my life is like this when I work:

Well followers and readers, keep your fingers and toes crossed for me. I’d cross my toes if I could but I just broke about 5 of them from moving. OH well. Let’s see where today’s discovery will take me… See you tomorrow or later. 🙂

You messed with the wrong girl

I hardly ever check my mail. However I was babysitting for my friend yesterday and when she came home she was going through her mail. So when I came home I decided to check my mail too. Well thank god I did because what did I find in my mail? A nice lovely eviction notice form my landlord. Yes that’s right, they want me out. It’s a “just cause” eviction too, meaning I didn’t do anything wrong, they just want me out. As soon as I opened it I just started laughing. I know this isn’t a typical response to an eviction notice, especially to someone who doesn’t have a job or any savings.

What I think these ass clowns don’t realize is that by evicting me they just started a war. Since I called the housing department at the end of March, that means the entire time I lived here since November the house wasn’t up to code. Translation: they weren’t allowed to collect rent. Second translation: I get all that money back. Third translation: Fuck you.

I could fight them and stick around here but I do NOT want to live in this house anymore. With all the problems I’ve had in the past, I don’t see it getting any better. Especially with the summer coming up, all the bugs, and how hot it’s going to get in here. (The winter was brutal with how cold it was in here, even with a new furnace!) I don’t want to have to deal with these slumlords anymore.

Normally I would be freaking out, but I have a backup solution. My very amazing best friend (the one I just wrote about in my last blog) has offered her entire basement up to me as a spot to live. Her brother used to live down there, so it’ll be perfect for me. The entire basement is open, but then there is a room that is closed off for a bedroom. So I’d be able to set up all my furniture that I have in my house now in the basement and then set up my bedroom too. We haven’t discussed payment or anything, but we’ll get into that later.

Her ex has until the end of the month to get the rest of his stuff out of the house so I can’t move my stuff in until the beginning of next month. They gave me until June 12 to move. She has an office that’s right down the street from where I live now, which also happens to have a shit ton of moving boxes. So what we devised a plan. I’m going to start using some of those boxes and start packing some stuff up here and store it at her warehouse/office. (I hate clutter so I don’t want to keep a bunch of boxes here) Then after the first of the month I can pack up the rest of the house, rent a moving truck and load up the house here, take it to the warehouse and load up there, then drive it to my new home and unload!

I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. Sometimes we know the reason, sometimes we don’t know it right away, and sometimes we never know. But it’s quite possible that me getting kicked out of my dad’s house and forced to live in this piece of shit taught me a lesson. It taught me how to take care of myself, how to live alone and independently, and to grow the fuck up. It taught me that I don’t have to rely on my dad to go grocery shopping every weekend for food if I want to eat, I have to do that stuff. I have to clean the bathroom if it’s dirty, all these things that I should’ve learned a long time ago, but never did.

I feel like this place helped me grow up. Despite all the bullshit and disgusting shit I had to deal with here, it did do something for me. So when I said everything happens for a reason, getting thrown out of the house I lived in my entire life was a blessing in disguise.

Now I am just waiting to hear back from this attorney I contacted about getting all this back rent because legally I’m entitled to it. (Hence why I titled this blog you messed with the wrong girl.) Most of the other people who live in this neighborhood are all junkies. (This town has a baddddddddd heroin problem, which is why I am kind of glad I’m moving back to my old hometown) Junkies usually don’t go that route because they usually do something wrong in order to get evicted, or have something to hide, or even priors that would make them look bad in court. Guess what bitches? My record is clean, I’ve always paid my rent in full and on time, my checks have always cleared, and you have NOTHING ON ME. I have a LOT on you. Like how your maintenance man wouldn’t fix my house for MONTHS, until YOU told me to call the housing department myself because YOU (meaning my landlord) live in California and couldn’t really do much from there.

I did want to go a lot farther with this buttttttttttt a friend of mine works at a country club and she’s working today and told me to come up there for lunch, ON HER!!! Uh, duh. So I have to take a shower and stuff because I’m still in my jammies! Oh and the friend of mine that I’m speaking of is the cousin of my ex that I just had thrown in jail. Ironic. Whatever. My economics teacher was wrong when she said there’s no such thing as a free lunch. Suck it professor!

Fail

Today I was supposed to have a totally productive day and get all this shit done and did I? Nope. My day feels kind of like:

In the meantime I did manage to lose my phone, just another disaster after another I guess with me. I keep on making mistakes left and right that I know will bite me in the ass but, for some reason I just don’t care? I’m not sure. Maybe too much positivity?

(Being the ADHD person that I am, I stepped away from the computer and came back a little bit later which I often do when I write my blogs.) Oh well my phone has been found. It was in the rain ALL DAY. So I freak out thinking out shit another thing I am going to have to pay for right? NOPE. SO FUCKING LUCKY. This $1 case I bought on eBay from some random country in Asia was worth it. Just a flimsy ass piece of plastic. I put stickers on it and rip them off to jazz the case up but you get the point:

Perhaps all that positivity I was just saying might be too much is actually helping. Karma in a good way. Oh so anyway, the shit I was supposed to do today I’m going to do it tomorrow. I stayed out late last night and I shouldn’t have. Especially when it’s the one night I have something to do in the morning, while I don’t have a job and I completely just failed. Oh well, it’s not like these fuckers are getting their money any way. So what if it’s late? I’m paying the mother fucking $35 late fee in escrow, bitch! It’s just buying me time really.

Anyway I was supposed to hang out with an old friend tonight but I totally bailed. Maybe because I haven’t showered or am still wearing my makeup from yesterday and give 0 fucks about today? Part of me is just a little scared to open up this box because I know it’s trouble considering the circumstances under which we met. But I am not like most people. Anyone with a mental illness knows this. We just don’t meet nice people, and fall in love, and everything’s perfect. Or maybe I just haven’t found the right one who understands my craziness? Until then, I seek out crazy.

Saying it, well, typing it, I guess makes it sound like wow, why am I doing this but none of it is ever meant to go anywhere. But he and i have stayed in contact since this incident which happened a couple years ago. Minimal contact, but contact. We haven’t actually seen each other, just spoken to each other online and on the phone. I actually talked to his mom once too, oops. Anyway, I bailed on him today because I know I have to get this shit done in the morning and if I hang out with him, I won’t. I know myself too fucking well. So possibly tomorrow night? We shall see.

I know he really needs some positive influence in his life, and I was once that for him and I hope I still can be. So that’s what I’m hoping we can still have. I see him, and this other guy just making careless mistakes that keep getting them in trouble. I feel bad. It’s like I want to help.

Anyway, my mom was nice enough to say home from work today so I’d have a place to go while they worked on my house. The guy was super cute and I felt totally embarrassed answering the door in my PJ’s which I realized was a see through zebra zip up and I had a hot pink lace sports bra underneath and leggings. I bet he was really happy to see that. I guess I shouldn’t have slept soooooooo late. Oops. He probably thinks I’m a total slut because I have handcuffs on my nightstand. A little child gave them to me at a kids birthday party without me knowing (he put them in my purse) and I found them the next day. This is where I decided they should go. Hey, you never know 😉

(Sidenote: Yes, that is duck tape. I “refinished” them. They look awesome.)

Also, my mom got me these super cute Hello Kitty hair clips. Score!

I think someone is exhausted from playing with Mr. Big today. She literally dragged me up the porch of my mom’s house today because she was so excited. She is so fucking strong it’s redic. I had to jump like 4 stairs in flip flops with this dog on a leash carrying my huge ass purse and my laptop case. Whew! Taking her anywhere is such a task because she gets so excited and she’s so strong. She definitely works us both out!

Okay so tomorrow is Wednesday. I’ll try and get my shit together. *Sigh* I have to babysit tomorrow, I forgot. Shit. Even though my IPhone reminded me like hours ago. I still forgot. And it’s on like 3 calendars. I’m such a space cadet. I need to get off the internet.

Update 11:40 PM: