I just got the WordPress app working on my iPhone. What I wanted to say is I’ve been thinking a lot today about how I’ve alwayssss wanted a dog. I was never allowed to have one because my dad wouldn’t let me. But when I moved out last year, she’s the first thing I got. We’ve grown close over the past year. I’ve gotten to know her personality more, but I’ve also noticed why they call them mans best friend. LOYALTY. This dog is so loyal to me. So, I’m sure a lot of you have children, but my dog is my child. I always knew I never really wanted kids, turns out all I wanted was a dog. I’d be a horrible mother, but I’m a great dog mom. I say I’d be a bad mom because there’s a huge chance if I had a kid, they could end up like me. That’s one thing I don’t want to put someone through. Mental illnesses and addiction. Noooo way. I may never get married. But your animals are loyal and loving whether your single or not, if you have a mental illness or addiction. She can totally sense when I’m having a bad day, if I’m in pain, sick, going crazy.
Don’t you just want to squish that face? I love having this app on my phone because I can blog a lot more often. On the go, more day to day adventures. I don’t have a job right now (will explain later, maybe) so there’s lots of time for cuddles, kisses and job hunting!
I’ve applied for tons of jobs. All different types. I hope that by applying now, most companies are waiting until the beginning of the year to hire. So hello, happy new year, give me a new job!
I am so excited to put this year behind me. I have wasted so much time and money being unhappy this year. I need to get my mojo back. And by mojo I mean my happiness. This, my happy place. I used to be so good at tuning out the bullshit and going inside my own space that I was just happy in. My little bubble. Was it all the drugs though? Guess I’ll have to find out by trying to get back my little happiness bubble.
I just had a phone interview for this job that I really want. I felt bad because my phone kept breaking up and losing signal. But once we started, I blew their mother fucking minds. Of course I did. I’m me. So what did I do? I NAILED IT BITCH.
I entitled this blog people pleaser because if you’re going to interview me over the phone for a sales position, I’ll sell the fuck out of myself. I’ll even shine your mother fucking shoes. Now I have to do this online assessment. I’m glad he told me it wasn’t timed because most people skip through it and don’t go through the next part of interviews.
THE ONLY REASON I’m a little nervous about working here is because someone I used to look up as mentor works there. He thinks I am the reason he got fired. So I’m nervous. We have always been cool together and I really hope this changes things. I want a fresh new start, and it’s comforting to know there will be someone I know. Just not comforting to know they hate me for the WRONG reasons. For my own sanity I may just set the record straight.
But anyway, this blog isn’t about him, it’s about me. YAY!
All the shit I have been through, it’s like someone is finally listening and giving me break. I’m going to do this assessment later because I’m a little dazed and well, yeah.
That’s more like it. Peace out bitches. Here’s a selfie for you!
So I am officially in a relationship with good. I feel really good about my decision to make a commitment to him, although it usually makes me want to do bad things when they’re not around. But he’s different and he takes care of me, as I mentioned. I don’t have any fears with him, he just does things for me without me even asking. It’s never like I did this for you, so you should do this for me. I think my perception of relationships is changing.
Mostly because I closed off emotionally for 7 years, then when I finally met someone, they were horrible to me and for me, I just got super close super quick. It’s like all the things I didn’t feel for 7 years came out in all the wrong ways, well more like on the wrong people. I’m not going backwards, I feel like making this change who is like a prince charming means I’m done with all the bad men. Putting their bullshit in a box, storing it on a shelf, and letting it be. I’m done with men hurting me and making me feel like a piece of shit, and getting in my head. I’m a good girl (hehe, kinda) and deserved to be treated right.
Nice guys were always too nice for me, so I could never be with one. Plus, I blog about all my mental illnesses so I feel like nice guys can’t handle how crazy I can be sometimes. It’s not my fucking fault.
(Currently Listening to KT Tunstall, “Suddenly I see”) I just took my boo after basically kidnapping him for a couple days. I’m supposed to hang out with my girl whose out to eat with her man. She said she’s supposed to come back here but she might end up hanging out with him since they’re both kid-less, but I really hope she does want to hang. I’m in the mood since my boo left. It’s really great to live with my friend of 25 years. I know my blogs have been a little confusing because of how much stress I was under from moving but now that things are coming together.
(Currently listening to John Mayer, “Why Georgia”) Things are so much better than living at my old house and it’s not a piece of shit. I’m back in my home town where I know where everything is. Getting back to a comfort zone of some sorts. I haven’t moved very much so it was very stressful, especially doing it all by myself. I am not used to doing things on my own, despite being 29 years old. I very much rely on others for help and there was no one there to help me this time. I was doing everything by myself and had no motivation to do anything, but so much desire to get the fuck out of my old house.
(Currently listening to Franz Ferndinand, “Take Me out”) I am kind of in transition since I don’t know how long I’ll be living here, when I’ll get a job, what the fuck is going to happen with me, but I’m just taking things day by day. Living in the moment. Trying to be free and fearless, and not let my anxiety get the best of me.
It’s funny how certain people, like good, who is my BOYFRIEND *gasp* can just change us, and make us feel a certain way. Special, and good, and for the first time in my life I feel like I KNOW the other person cares about me. Their feelings are genuine, they don’t want anything out of me, other than me to be me. That’s a reassuring feeling. I have a friend who is in a relationship right now and feels completely under appreciated and taken for granted, and gets no affection whatsoever. She can’t live with him, or without him, she’s torn. But I told her if she’s not happy there are other men out there that you can be with that will make you feel totally happy.
(Currently listening to Britney Spears, “Piece of me”) Life is all about the pursuit of happiness, which is why I love that song so much. We only get one shot at this life, we there is no time for negativity and unhappiness. Live life to the fullest.
Obviously I am more interested in my music at this point and I think just about all I came on the interwebz to say today. Enjoy my fuckery of a musical selection, yes, I know it’s all over the place, just like me 😉
Who says you have to be IN love to have love? I’m surrounded by love every single day. Maybe not in the way I want it, but I’m getting there. Being around these kids that love and look up to me so much makes me realize you can find love in a hopeless place. I have. I’m winning the fight. I know this blog is my happy place, and lately it hasn’t been to happy. But, I haven’t been too happy lately. Now, I’m happy. I feel like I’m on the right track. Or some track at least. I haven’t been on track in a long time. I’ve been lost in a chaotic space for far too long, and I’m back bitches.
I have been feeling good spiritually, which helps. I went to my old home today and donated all my exes stuff. It’s going to go to people who actually want it, and need it, and not use my old home as a storage facility. These were our last ties, and I tried to be nice and give it to his family, and they blew me off, so that’s it. Bye bye. Not feeling any guilt or resentment over it. All the things he did to me, and how he did me so wrong. I felt like a fool for actually wanting him back for a half second despite all the horrible things he did to me and in life in general.
I’m glad I’ve grown into myself, and back into the dating world. It’s pretty scary when you cut yourself off emotionally from everyone for so long, then you try to love again. You have blinders on for sure. I knew I was going down and dark and dangerous path, but you get sucked in. Their games get me. But I got smart. Much like this.
You’re in jail, I’m in not. When you get out of jail, you’ll still be on a shit load of tight ass probation which you fucked up last time within 2 months. Oh, and and alcohol tether will be real nice for an alcoholic. It feels good to have those problems not be my problems anymore. Adios. Rot in your misery. I wish you well, but bad people like you never get better because they don’t want to. Bye bye. Later hater.
But back to love. I feel like I’m incapable of real love. I keep going back and forth between two of the most different men possible. I can’t choose. I like the nice guy, he gives me what I want, what I deserve, tells me what I want, and not because he wants to get in my pants. He’s generous, sincere, kind hearted, and true, all the way through. On the other hand I have my kind of ex, but we were friends for a long time. We argue about stupid things, but we relate to each other on a different level that most can’t understand. He does things for me too. I guess I’m conflicted because I’m used to getting hurt, that if anyone is going to hurt, I guess I’ll be doing the hurting?
No, I’m too nice of a person to be like that. So I’ll make a decision. One knows about the other. The other does not, and would probably die if he found out. I’m keeping my options option. That’s it. I’m a single woman and entitled to do so.
But you don’t to have an actual boyfriend, girlfriend or partner to have love. Love is everywhere. Love is waking up with a smile and getting out of bed in the morning when you used to lay in bed all day depressed. Love is having little kids wanting to spend every waking minute with you because they think you’re the coolest and you’re their best friend. (because technically you’re not their aunt) Love is being able to help someone who needs help out, and asking for nothing in return. We do find it in hopeless places. Maybe because we feel hopeless, and not capable of love. But we all are. No matter your depression, your mental illness, whatever is dragging you down. Find love in that god damn pudding you want to eat but haven’t because you’re worried about calories. FUCK IT. Love is everywhere, we have to find it any make it ours, claim it, and call it love.
If you have days like I had, remember, there’s beauty in you too. You are beautiful. Inside and outside. Love yourself for who you are. We have one life to live, embrace it. You are a beautiful individual and you should embrace it.
I hope this is a little bit back to the happy place my blog once was. The Calvin Harris and House station on Pandora always get me inspired to write. Hence where the song and this blog came from. Please feel free to share or subscribe to my blog. My goal is to raise awareness about mental illness, so if you, or someone you know struggles with one, or you think might have one, please, send them my blog. I live with this everyday. It’s a bitch. But if I can go through it everyday, I believe most can. All it takes is a little bit of this, which my blog has given some people…
Enjoy your almost weekend bitches! ❤ Enjoy the song and the blog and hopefully you’ll find love in a hopeless place.
Am I surprised? No. This nice man who cares about me, and truly could be something real, but I don’t know if I am ready to go down that path just got back from vacation. However, the entire time he was gone I reconnected with my ex who, over the course of the day, made me realize i made the wrong decision on who I chose. He doesn’t tell me how beautiful I smell, or how pretty I am constantly. He doesn’t love looking into my eyes, or he enjoy being around me. I have that with someone else and I’m afraid to proceed because I feel like there is something bad lurking around the corner. Truth is, I’m already around the corner and there’s something bad here. I just don’t know how I can be so stupid. I love to ruin good things. It’s just what I’m good at.
I automatically assume something work out with the age issue, but really, it’s only me who has the problem with it. But I feel that I’m too fucked up of a person to be deserving of someone who doesn’t deserve to deal with any of my bullshit. My freak outs, my insecurities, my constant need for affection and attention. But he wants to do those things for me, without asking. I almost question it because I feel does he really feel this way? How could someone feel this way about me. ME. I am just too out there. He’s so not. That’s why I feel like I belong with these people who are out there, and fucked up like me. But I know that’s not all I’m capable getting, and I sure as shit don’t want to settle for being with someone who makes me miserable.
I just want to be sun shines and unicorns and back to my happy, care free life. Not worried about when someone is going to pass out in my bed and if they might not even wake up. I’m not deserving of good. I’m on the phone with the nice man ass the other is passed out in my bed. I can’t believe I am even still writing about this, or even at all. But this is where I come to get my thoughts out, and well here are my thoughts. It’s a fucked up web that I’ve weaved. Maybe I’m the black widow inside that kills everything that tries to get in my web, whether it be good or back.
I love this song. I figured a music video for the song “Sunday Morning” would be a good way to kick off my Sunday morning blog. I’m surprised I got out of bed before 1:00 PM today considering how tired I was yesterday. I couldn’t even hang with my homies, I had to go home and pass out because of how tired I was! I’m pretty sure getting 3 hours of sleep on top of smoking a shit load of weed all day didn’t help my cause much. Whatever.
Yesterday the guys came and worked on my house a little more. They’re done ripping walls and shit out so I finally vacuumed in the house. These construction guys have made such a mess. There’s drywall, insulation, nails and screws EVERYWHERE. Not to mention all of the stuff they ripped out of my house, they didn’t even dispose of it. They left everything in my yard. The same yard my dog goes out and plays in. There are nails and shit sticking of of some of those boards too. They reassured me they’re coming back today to do more work.
I really like this guy that is working on my house. My landlord hired him since the other man he hired to do maintenance and repairs is the one who never mentioned any of these problems to my actual landlord, hence why I called the housing department to get the house ininspected\\He asked me yesterday if I can put in a good word for him to my landlord. I said absolutely! So I had to call my landlord anyway, so in my voicemail I made sure to say something along the lines of, “Thank you so much for hiring Ron. He’s been so great and has done such great work on my house. I hope you keep him around because he’s awesome.) I currently no longer speak to the other man he has working for him because he’s the reason I had to get this housing inspection in the first place.
My landlord lives in California, and I live in Michigan. He obviously can’t be available to come over to one of the homes if there’s a problem which is why he has this man Chuck working for him as the manager/handyman. Since I moved in here back in November I had been making miscellaneous complaints to Chuck about things that needed to be repaired in the house. The biggest one at the time was the front door. My DTE bill went up over $400 during the winter because my front door wasn’t hung right, and had about 1 1/2 inches of space above the door that cold air would blow right through.
One time I even got my dad over here when Chuck came so Chuck couldn’t try and work one over on me. My dad kept asking him, “Would YOU put this door on your house? Look at this thing!” Chuck’s response was, “Well, I just put new laminate doors on my house.” Uhhhh, you didn’t answer the question bro. He avoided every question he was asked, as well as talk in circles about everything, so nothing was ever done.
I finally got so sick of paying my rent on time every month and being ignored for having legit issues on my home that I rent, so they’re responsible for making the repairs. My landlord in California had NO knowledge of this (or so he claims, and I sort of believe him, I’m still deciding) and he’s the one who told me to call the housing department for the city to schedule an inspection. Sure enough it failed inspection with a 26 page report.
They had 30 days to complete all the repairs on the list. Tomorrow will be day #30 and I have already scheduled the inspection for 2:00 in which I know they won’t pass. My landlord also threatened me with eviction if I tried to with hold my rent from him for this month while they were making the repairs. I looked up my rights and responded back to him that he can’t evict me for that, and he can’t threaten me with eviction either. I told the building inspector what he said to me and he told me when he comes to look at the house tomorrow he will also give me some legal advice about what we do next.
So now it’s 6:30 PM. I realized I never finished my Sunday morning blog. I managed to take a shower and look decent. The guys never showed up to do any work on my house today. (Big surprise there) My mom asked me to come over and help decorate cookies.
I got pretty creative in my decorating as you can see. I didn’t have much to work with as far as different sprinkles and shit but I got jazzy with what was available. I’m now over at my friends house drinking a hard cider and smoking a W’s (weed and wax)
I just never know where the day is going to take me….
I never review my blogs before I post them but I’m sure by reading them you can see my bipolar and ADHD come out through my words about my day and shit. Filled with a million thoughts, highs, lows, up, down, sideways, going here doing that.
Ah well these guys are about to play some video games. I may stick around for a little more 420 action but I’m pretty toasted, baked, high, fried, whatever. But I think I might go home and veg the fuck out. It sounds real nice man. Perhaps I will blog again later. We shall see. Peace out homies. Enjoy your Sunday. (Which in my world is the day of rest.)
Okay and now that I’m home I’m going to rape Netflix and watch the new episode of Nurse Jackie, and of course eat some of these delicious cookies. Mmmmmmm cookies.
Also, I wanted to post these pictures of Maizy I snapped last night. I got my Coach scarf and put it on her for a couple photo ops so she would look like a designer doggy. I think she pulled it off nicely. My little doggy fashion model.
I had such a shitty day yesterday. If we are friends on Facebook, you probably saw my statuses and could tell something was up. I talked to my ex and he pretty much still has a hold on me. I found out he was in the area the other night. I felt compelled to say something even though I knew I would regret it. Why can’t I give up? Why can’t I let someone who is no good for me out of my life. My head tells me one thing, but my heart tells me another.
My heart always wins when it’s head versus heart. ❤
As humans all we want is to be loved. Even me. I feel like I’ve been broken and hurt so many times that even when I meet a nice guy, I run. I rarely meet nice guys though. That’s the first problem. My friend and I were discussing how nice guys are just too easy. We go after the bad boys because they’re more of a challenge. I guess that’s what its all about. The challenge. Anyway, switching gears to what I wanted to talk about.
After how horrible I felt yesterday, I really wanted to curl up in bed all day today and feel sorry for myself. That sounds pathetic, but my blog is about honesty. I couldn’t possibly do that though because it’s Friday, the weather is fantastic, and I should move the fuck on. Sometimes being ADHD isn’t all that bad because I have the ability to get the fuck over myself when I know I’m acting like a baby over some bullshit. I decided to turn my frown upside down and SMILE because it’s Friday.
My bestie called me and asked if I wanted to hang and watch her tater tots for her while she goes on a work dinner. I had to wait until the construction men got to my house before I could leave. Sure enough I get here, and she’s not even here! I called her and I was like WTF you’re not even here? I’m breaking in. (Not really, I have a key, but I still like saying that.) Since she decided to go to this event tonight I also had to bring some dress options for her to wear. I had to keep in mind that this is a WORK thing and I can’t dress her like a whore. I brought her the most mature dresses I could find. Hopefully one of these dress options work.
She just got home with her 3 kids which are pretty much my kids too. I’m glad we have each other to cheer each other up. We have been friends since we were 4 and we’re about to be 29 so I’d say she’s more of a sister. I then got a call from another one of my friends that asked me earlier in the week to hang out tonight. I of course forgot. She did go on for quite a while and made me feel like shit about it. She also told me she had the opportunity to go out of town the same weekend of my birthday because it was cheaper, but she didn’t because of me. At the end of our conversation she said well you won’t be seeing me for a while because I’ll be busy.
Really? Someone from her past recently came into her life and ever since that happened I knew I was going to take a back seat to their newly rekindled “friendship.” People forget things. We talked all this afternoon before I made these plans and she never mentioned it once, or the day before hand. Honestly, I think she’s just looking to pick a fight. I can’t stand when people behave this way. It’s completely unnecessary and I am not interested in entertaining this negativity.
To me it sounds like jealousy. I didn’t do one thing for you, because human beings forget things, and you tell me you’ve already replaced me out of your life. I can’t be everyone’s everything. I’m done entertaining this.
Well, my friend is making nachos while the kiddos play outside and I want to just get off the internet machine and enjoy the rest of my day. Put all this unnecessary drama behind me and just move the fun on. My birthday is in 5 days.
Well today is a magical day for stoners. It’s our holiday! Not like we don’t celebrate it everyday or anything. But today we get to dedicate our entire day to the fact that we love to smoke pot. We’re entitled to that. Shit, we celebrate George Washington & Abe Lincoln’s birthdays, we should celebrate this too!
I’m dressed for the occasion as you can see.
I am going to take this opportunity and post to talk about why weed is great and how it has helped me with my mental illness. I know it’s still technically considered a “drug” but that’s something the government wants us to believe. Some people just have a problem with it because it’s illegal, and don’t even consider the benefits. It’s fucking SCIENCE. I don’t give a shit what the fucking law says, it truly has helped me.
I know that I’ll probably be on medication for my mental illnesses for the rest of my life. Harsh chemicals in my body for the rest of my life can’t really be healthy. I choose to smoke weed because while yes, it still is smoking, it’s fucking natural bro. You can’t tell me that a plant is harmful to my heath. You can’t tell me that something natural is way better than something man made out of poison. You can’t tell me that despite it being illegal, it doesn’t help me.
When I smoke, I get relaxed. I laugh, I say stupid shit, other people laugh. I get hungry. I get lazy sometimes. But there’s never been a single time in my life where I’ve been so high off pot that it has destroyed something, ruined my life, injured someone, or anything NEGATIVE. It’s not addictive. It’s fun, and it makes me feel free. I DON’T SEE ANY SERIOUS PROBLEMS HERE. Have you ever read how many side effects are on one medication? I’m on like 6 different medications. How can this be good? You know what side effect should come with every bag of weed you buy? Warning: May cause extreme happiness and hunger. Order tacos before use, and get on the internet machine and Google image search unicorns for instant LOLz.
I know I’m not a fucking doctor, and I haven’t done all the research. But I’ve researched and experimented enough to know that there’s nothing harmful, dangerous, bad, or negative about smoking weed, other than the negative stigma our government has given it by making it illegal.
It pisses me off that pot is illegal. For example there is a local ordinance in Ann Arbor that allows you to just get a ticket for possession of weed instead of going to jail. However, there are also state cops that have more authority who will patrol the same areas as the local police just looking to bust people for small time marijuana charges because it’s an easy bust. Seems like a total waste and allocation of government resources, doesn’t it? THAT’S BECAUSE IT IS. There are so many people in jail right now for small time marijuana charges, and REAL criminals are out on the streets. You couldn’t possibly spin this to make it right because it’s wrong. SO WRONG.
I am happy that Michigan does support medical marijuana. When this was being proposed into office I was in a lot of political groups at the time to help raise awareness to voters on why they should pass it. I’d like to think it was my way of giving back to my community as a stoner. All of our hard work that year paid off because Michigan passed the bill! I am fully qualified to get my medical marijuana card, it just comes down to the fact I don’t have money right now. It’s something my doctor and I discuss, because I have always been open & honest with my doctor about my pot use. I think it’s important for him to know I use it because it will directly effect how he medically treats me. He can’t prescribe it himself, but he has given me all the necessary paperwork and list of physicians who can help.
Also, here’s some fucking food for thought…. (literally)
Yeah, suck on those nuts!!!
Thank you all for reading my stoned rant/blog today. Maybe you learned something, maybe you didn’t. Perhaps you agree, or disagree. It’s even possible that you’re so fucking high right now you can’t even comprehend what I’m saying at all, and the words are floating off your computer screen. (If you are, message me, I want your dealers #….) But in honor of today I felt as though it was important to blog about it. Smoke on friends. One love. ❤
4/20 UPDATE 10:08 PM EST:
The day has been great. I managed to get out of my house and pick up some 4/20 supplies at a super good deal. Some of the swag included this:
Pure medical grade buddy. I don’t fuck around.
200 MG of pot per cookie. STRONG AS FUCK. I got 2. Shared half now I’m going balls deep on this one. My friend also picked up a pipe to smoke wax out of that looks like Master Shake from Aqua Teen Hunger force, and it’s totally rad, and gets you superrrrr weird.
THEN as I was pulling up I decided to check my mail, and guess what arrived? A check for $198.10 to me!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I don’t even work there anymore and they’re still paying me and sending me checks, paying my unemployment, and I have free state insurance. Well I’d say getting fired has really done a lot of good for me! You are qualified for all these free programs! And bitches be paying you like what upp!!! Yay for 4/20 and it almost being my birthday. I changed my wallpaper today on my iPhone! YAYYYYY!
Okay so I am a little tipsy/dazed, but I just had a really good, honest deep conversation about life with a old friend from the past who I recently got back in touch with. I wasn’t expecting that, but damn, don’t deep conversations just rock your world sometimes? I feel like it just did with me. I was very influential in this person’s life even though I have been out of it for a while. But we did meet each other under very weird circumstances in a place where you’re vulnerable as fuck. When someone sees that side of you, the side that is raw and real, you just kind of click. We’re able to talk about everything together. Things that haven’t come up in a long ass time. I don’t know, it’s almost like another form of therapy for me. I just got off the phone and wanted to blog about this feeling. Being open to someone, but not feeling vulnerable and judged, but there was once this like unspoken things between us. I don’t feel like I’m going to get hurt because there’s no pressure, and right now we’re just there for each other. It’s weird. I don’t really know what’s happening. I am going to be super careful though. I will not go out of my way for shit. That’s all I’m saying, and not to say it’s even going there, but still. If something were to happen, that’s a huge danger zone so I can’t even get think like that. Just one step, and friendship is all that this is right now. Okay, off the internet machine. I’m watching this in hopes of passing out, despite not being tired. I’m wired as fuck, in a manic state with my bipolar.
I took full advantage of this beautiful day! I was such a bum yesterday and literally slept the entire day. I think I had some kind of bug or something. Needless to say it’s gone! I feel FANTASTIC today. My dog woke me up around 8 AM, probably because I never let her out last night. I got ready and jazzed up and make some phone calls. THEN here’s the fantastic part. I went to my old work to meet up with my friend and they had a pizza party for lunch, and she brought me some pizza! Haha take that fucktards! I’m hijacking your pizza party even after you fire my ass. Mwuahahahahaha. I also had it out with my HR department for never getting back to me about my paycheck, despite telling me yesterday she would. I called her, emailed her, then I finally said fuck it and called the main headquarters. Sure enough after I talked with them I got an email from her. I have clearly said to her that I just want to be done with the company already, and basically hurry the fuck up so I can go away forever.
I also heard some shady shit that’s going on at work. (No surprise) But my name is STILL coming up. Are you kidding? I mean come the fuck on. It flatters me that people give that many fucks about me, and that they keep bringing my name up this long after I leave. Get over yourselves.
Anyway, after I met up with my friend she decided it was way too nice outside to go back to work. (and my old boss knew she was meeting up with me…. what a bad influence) We hit up Walmart and I did enough grocery shopping for me & Maizy both that should last us a couple of weeks. My friend and I also decided to put on dresses. I mean shit it’s perfect dress weather!
Oh also I finally got my new front door and screen door! Yay! Ask, believe, and you shall receive. I swear when the sun is out, nothing bad can happen. I definitely think I had some seasonal depression, but you would too if you had Michigan weather. Spring tortures us with like one super nice day early on, then it gets cold as fuck for a few more weeks, then maybe another nice day here or there. We say if you don’t like the weather, just wait 5 minutes. It’s true, so when we get these nice days I really enjoy them.
The image of the song that I posted is one of my “happy songs” and today it was fitting. It was nice to have my sun roof open, blasting this song, hair waving all over the place, no fucks given at all. My “happy songs” are songs that I can listen to and they will instantly put me in a good mood. I have attached the video for your listening enjoyment. It’s house music, so it might not be your taste, but my taste is everything. You really should listen to it despite it not being your taste!
My mom also adopted a new dog today! She’s so fucking cute. Her name currently is Dot but they are working on another name. Here’s some pics of her! The other dog in the pic is my mom’s other dog Mr. Big. She wants to name this dog Carrie (from Sex and the City, Carrie and Mr. Big, so cute…anyway) but her boyfriend doesn’t want to. But they would be soooooooooo cute as Carrie & Mr. Big! (You can also catch a glimpse of my FAVORITE sandals in the first picture, courtesy of Victoria’s Secret from like 94850283509 years ago)
Okay, well I wanted to update before I pop back over to my friends house. I really just feel like changing out of this dress and putting on my jammy’s but I guess I can show face for a little bit longer. I am already in this cute dress, and BONUS my friend’s sister pulled up and had a bunch of earrings, and gave me this pair because they match my dress! I just WON AT LIFE TODAY!!!I Okay, time to jet. I’m getting a new bathtub tomorrow! Yahoo!!!!!!!
Also thank you again to everyone who reads my blog. I do this as a therapy tool for myself, but it’s awesome that other people read it. I just want to raise awareness to the mental illness community and show that it’s not something we should hide or be ashamed of. This is who we are, and we deal with it. Sometimes I am bat shit fucking crazy, but most of the time I’m just misunderstood. As Madonna said, “This is who I am, you can like it or not. You can love me, or leave me, but I’m never gonna stop, no no.”
welcome to my happy place 